IKEA February 2024

My dad and I went shopping at the nearby IKEA store this weekend.  Dad had a simple plan: it's a beautiful sunny Saturday, everyone will be out for a walk in the park, and the

store will be empty.  As we quickly found out, at least half of the population of the state of Illinois had the same thinking.  I probably already know what it looked like on Ellis Island in New York 100 years ago.  Fortunately, we quickly bought what we came for and still had time for a short walk around our pond.  On Sunday, after lunch, the ASSEMBLY event took place.  The event was preceded by an hour's preparation when Dad brought almost all the tools and equipment from our garage.  I watched him with increasing nervousness.  However, Dad reassures me: "Don't worry, it will be an easy job."  Then he started; the constant metal noises made me sleep for about 20 minutes.  Silence woke me up; I saw my Dad holding a fully functional industrial ceiling fan in his hand.  I was a little taken aback because we definitely weren't buying this.  Dad also realized this and began to disassemble the fan. Later, he makes something like a bed frame or a rocking garden chair in the next half hour.  Then he sighed loudly and started looking for something in the IKEA box.  I

He finally found it: Instructions for assembly.  He read it, resignedly said, "OK," and began to carry all the tools back to the garage.  Our living room stopped looking like a rocket engine assembly line.  Then, with one screwdriver and instructions, he put together a simple stand with four shelves in less than 5 minutes.  When it was done, he smiled at me and said, "Didn't I tell you it would be an easy job?"  I was speechless.  If David Copperfield saw him today, he would immediately announce the end of his career and retire.  One book says that men are from another planet.  In that case, my dad is from another galaxy.  If in the future you heard Dad say, "That'll be an easy job."  For god's sake, run...lol.